Dreams...
We all have them. Not literal, in bed nighttime dreams of falling or winning the lottery. But actual dreams. Dreams of the life we want to have. What we want to achieve. Goals.
I have been dreaming of moving to Florida for as long as I can remember. I was born in Miami, but moved to Chicago when I was about 3. We would visit through the years as I had family there and of course my mom began to take me to Walt Disney World when I was pretty young. So now we all know where that obsession came from. LoL Ever since I was maybe 8 or 9, I knew one day I would move back. I always wanted to work at Walt Disney World. I remember wanting to work the trams from the TTC to the Magic Kingdom parking lot, because you got to tell everyone heading the MK all the fantastic things going on for the day! As I grew older, I looked at the Photopass CMs because I loved taking pictures and figured that would be a fun job! Still even I would love to be a character attendant, so that I could help everyone with that magical meeting with their favorite character. One day I will get my job at Disney.
In the meantime, my life has been full of pursuing other dreams while living my life. Graduation from high school, going away to college for a year, then attending community college. Working my first job. Having my first boyfriend. Breaking up with him. Dating many, many others. Meeting, dating, and marrying Princess Kayla's father. Having a baby, Princess Kayla. Being a mommy. Going through a divorce. Being a mommy. While being unemployed. Being a mommy. Moving back home with my parents. Being a mommy. Finding a new job. Being a mommy. Being promoted to full time and receiving benefits. Being a mommy. Living life. Enjoying what life offered, eduring hardships, constantly growing and changing.
All the while, the dream of moving to Florida grew further and further away while living life here in Chicago. Annual vacations helped re-kindle it, but then once returning to real life for a few weeks, the dream would die. Until after my divorce. I knew it would be hard but I knew eventually I needed to move myself and Princess Kayla to Florida. I've struggled with the thought of moving so far away with her. Would it be the right decision? Would I be able to be independent and strong enough to support us? I debated these questions over and over for the past 3 years.
Finally, while on vacation last month, I realized that I need to be happy. I need to live MY life. I need to live somewhere that I can build a life and a future for me and Princess Kayla. Something about being in Florida feels right. It feels like HOME! Some people tell me, "Oh, it's just because of Disney and you can go all the time". Well, yes and no. It's not all about Disney. Yes, that will be an amazing bonus once we move to be Annual Passholders and be able to go anytime we want. Hopefully one day I will be able to be a Cast Member there and fulfill that dream. It's something about Florida that makes me feel like me. That makes me feel alive. That makes me enjoy life. I feel happy and at peace.
I am not giving up this time. I have wanted this for so long. I am NOT going to continue to let my life get away from me. I am going to follow my dream. As is the theme of many Disney movies. Never give up. Always do your best. It may be a bit of a struggle to get things in order, everything worked out as it needs to be. Am I scared? You have no idea how terrified I am! Am I determined? Absolutely!!! Will I do it? DEFINATLY!
"A dream is a wish your heart makes, when you're fast asleep. In dreams you will loose your heartache, whatever you wish for will be. Have faith in your dreams and someday, your rainbow will come shining through. No matter how your heart is grieving, if you keep on believing, the dream that you wish will come true!"
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